Confidence confusion
Hey, this is Esar ...
Confidence (ind: kepercayaan/keyakinan) is the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust. (source: google translate)
We heard all people talk about confidence,
- You gotta believe on yourself !
- Confidence is key !
- Be confidence !
- You can do it !
I'm fired up when i hear people say that to me, i think i'm gonna succeed to put that word into my mind when i'm gonna do something important.
- Going into an interview : be confidence !
- Facing an exam : be confidence !
- Competing in basketball tournament : be confidence !
- Picking up girls : be confidence !
etc
Most of us thinking we're gonna be success when we keep in mind to be confidence, but when we're at the very moment of what we're doing, often we stuck and don't really know what's the right thing to do next, and fail like a loser bitch.
Yeah ! I believe that confidence plays the big role to success.
But,
I think i can't be confidence by just putting words into my mind
Confidence is earned not gotten overnight or day.
I always think of it this way:
Say i wanna be a great basketball/soccer/volleyball player
I'm a beginner, what am i gonna do?
Of course, first, i'm gonna join a club, that's where i have to be because that's the place we suppose to be a player and know how to compete.
What i'm gonna do first?
Practice !
Of course ! i'm going to build some basic skill !
- I learn the fundamental of every practice part
- I apply everything i learn in a drilling (maybe i got my coach accompany me)
- Doing it over and over again in a consistent basis 3 times a week
But when it comes to a match in a tournament, i'm shocked, cause i don't know what to do. Every play happen so fast you can't even think for a second. What i have learned in the drilling didn't work out, what coach has told me wasn't applied. I started to feel like a failure, thinking there is no chance to improve and say "i'm not good at this even though i like it".
I'm embarassed.
to be a great player in sport, you have to be great in playing solo and as a team.
What i learn is, i don't have any fundamental insight or knowledge or experience, when it comes to a match or games.
I look at my opponent and my teammates whose skill is so much better than me, and my mind wondering "they must be the same like me at first. Is it me who's not fit in this sport or what, i love this game"
I come home and i watch how things work in videos of a big league match, all i look is a lot of players doing something unintended yet very organized and somewhat they do it so that it looks so easy. I mimic all of what they're doing.
And, when it comes to a game, what happen ?
- My mind start doing a lot of thinking and memorizing what i have learned in books, videos, articles, etc.
- I do my move very long in a must-very-fast situation.
- My teammates yell at me "WHAT THE FU** ARE YOU DOING !"
- The opponent take advantage of what i'm doing
- My coach substitutes me
- I'm getting embarrassed
I start to question my self, is it me? or something else. I mimic great players moves, what did i do wrong?
Apparently, i do all of that imitations in a wrong situation, and i can't distinguish what is the right or wrong situation. It was not effective, because you have to coordinate with other players too.
Once again, i feel embarrassed, feel like an idiot.
But, i don't give up, because i love the game, i love this sport !
I'm gonna do it again !
I do it over and over and over again. I keep the practice in a consistent basis, i face every match as much as i could, i learn so much and apply it right away, i learn my mistakes, i improve my weakness and never stop.
What i got ?
I don't realize that i reach a point that i don't have to overthink when it comes to a real match, when it comes to must-be-fast situation, because i have done everything it takes to be a great player and experienced so much failures so that i unconsciously and automatically tend to not doing a mistake (especially a fundamental mistake).
And when it comes to a tournament, it's exciting and there is a CONFIDENCE for winning the game.
That's what i think the truly confidence.
it's built by action, knowledge, failures, consistency over long period of time, and all of that generate experiences.
it's earned, it takes process, and process needs time,
it's not a gift in one single day.
it's not some word that some stranger put it in their facebook status.
it's not magic bullet or whatever people call it.
Salam
Esar
